As I enter the golden years of my life, I have been eagerly looking forward to retirement in another year or two, when I can trade my office desk for a fruity umbrella drink by the beach or a cabin on a cruise ship bound for exotic places. Or maybe just the luxury of waking up in the morning with nowhere I need to be. Then, BAM! Along comes Coronavirus, messing with our lives. I feel very fortunate to have not been infected, nor have those close to me. What it does mean, though, is a sort of forced early retirement, thanks to a reduction in hours at my office job and travel suspensions around the world having a disastrous effect on my travel agency business. Consequently, I now find myself with the time to travel, but nowhere to go nor the means to get there. Oh, the irony!
Similar to the feeling that newly retired people have after years of gainful employment, when my boss gave the order to stay home, I woke up the next day wondering, OK, what now? There were instant benefits, for sure, like sleeping late and living in pajamas all day. But lounging around in sweats all day gets boring and tiresome. Like many other people who have been unwittingly thrown into the unknown amidst a pandemic, I found myself searching for ways to fill all this time and space.
What day is it, anyway? It wasn’t long before I lost a sense of time. One day looks like the next, that looked like the last. The only day I am sure of is Thursday, the one day in the week that I go to the office. The rest of the week is a blur. By the time I realize it’s Sunday, and not Saturday, it’s already Monday. Or maybe it’s actually Tuesday. Who knows. I‘m no longer in the habit of consulting a calendar in the morning when I wake. That’s what workdays are for. Since I only work on Thursday, well, that’s the day that matters, unless you count trash Tuesday. But since Tuesday no longer exists in my week, my husband David, who has a better handle on days of the week, has taken over hauling the trash cans to the curb. Not that I’m complaining.
Now we have Covid-19 precautions required for stepping out into the world. For a person like me who thrives on routine, this is unsettling. Even though Rhode Island may currently be in Phase 3 of the Re-Open Plan, my level of tolerance for re-entering society and mingling with the masses is still in Phase I. Restaurant seating, for example, whether indoor or out, is not yet on my emotional radar. I made certain that our two recent beach visits occurred in the late afternoon to insure a generous 50-foot radius surrounding our patch of sand, and I still view a maximum of 8 people to be the perfect limit for social gatherings. I wear a mask faithfully, where necessary, even if doing so causes me to bump into things and trip over my own feet. My comfort level in supermarkets is severely low, and I leave the majority of marketing duties to David, who has a knack for knowing how to make shopping - with or without a mask - loads of fun ... or annoying, depending on the moods of the shoppers. Besides, he has developed a flare for cooking, demonstrating his prowess in the kitchen several nights a week, with tasty chicken dishes, homemade pizza and other culinary creations. You might think with all this newly acquired time, I would be more inclined to whip up a meal or bake a cake now and then. I say why ruin a good thing. Leave meal prep to the experts, like Chef David.
Cleaning the house used to be easy, not because I enjoyed it, but because I hired a team of experts to do it for me. They came in once a month, just enough to keep the dust bunnies at bay, the furniture polished and the floors mopped. All that was required of me was a quick wipe up here or there where needed until the cleaning crew reappeared in a month. Unfortunately, the cleaning service was the first cut in the household budget, and I am back to scrubbing my own floors. I can hear the snickers and see the eye rolls now. Don’t laugh, but it’s been a chore cleaning my own house. I even had to buy a sponge mop.
In a real retirement scenario, travel is a big part of the plan. The kids are gone, nothing to keep us tied down, so let’s go! Not happening. Not during a pandemic shut down. The loss of all three of our planned cruise vacations this year has been disappointing, to say the least. Gone are the whale sightings off the coast of Baja, Mexico, the thermal baths in Iceland, the Caribbean beach escape - and, the biggest letdown of all - the much desired Outlander tour in Scotland! While a few friends have ventured out on road trips or domestic flights, David and I have chosen caution over our need for adventure. Lounging in the backyard adirondack is a poor substitute for a romp around the Scottish Highlands in the footsteps of Jamie and Claire Fraser, but if things go as planned, we’ll be spending a week next month with the family at our favorite pair of Cape Cod beach cottages for a much needed escape.
The cold weather months were the hardest in the early days of the pandemic shut down. We saw the same four walls. Every day. We were stuck in a movie - Groundhog Day. Go to bed, wake up, and do it all over again. The marriage was tested. We used to pass like two ships in the night. Now we were stranded on the same island. Certain traits of his that annoyed me before now drive me nuts - silly things, really. I want the shades lowered, he wants them raised. I like the seat cover down, he likes it up. He needs to blast the sound system, and I need to hear myself think. He is loud when I want quiet, and please - don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee.
Thankfully, when tempers flare, we can create our own Covid social distancing, him to his basement office and me upstairs to mine. With distance learning, David spends a fair amount of time Zooming, teaching, practicing his sax, and otherwise staying out of my way. When I need to blow off steam, I retreat to my favorite plush recliner - the same one I referred to as “ugly” and was ready to dump a year ago - and read, write or on-line chat. With summer weather now upon us, you’ll more likely find me in the backyard Adirondack chair in the shade of a tree.
Forced semi-retirement hasn‘t been all unnerving, of course. At the start of the stay-at-home order months ago, David and I discovered new activities and re-visited old ones. We discovered that a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle was a relaxing way to pass the time during the late winter months, even if it did take three months to complete. We brushed the dust off board games like Scrabble and Monopoly. We challenged each other with the Jenga tower of blocks. We played endless games of Rummy. As a devoted fan of the Outlander TV series, I decided to attack the book series, and with eight books in the series, I’ll have enough reading to last through “Droughtlander”, what fans call the long wait between seasons. With show production postponed due to Covid, it will be a very long drought.
When I’m not reading about men in kilts, I’m blogging - something I started a few years back when I wrote about our adventures in travel. Now that I have invested in a new iPad Pro with Magic Keyboard, writing is way more fun and rewarding than ever from the seat of my “ugly” recliner. My husband even caught me glancing at the newspaper, a relic he still insists on having delivered to the house daily. As if one paper isn't enough, he needs three different papers on the weekends.
With encouragement from our personal trainer Vinny at Body and Soul Inspired Training, David and I have continued virtual workout sessions to maintain physical and mental health, but mostly to prevent becoming couch potatoes. Plus, with the money returned from our canceled vacations, we purchased a couple of quality bicycles. Make no mistake - riding a bike for the first time in 25 years was a re-learning curve for both of us. The trial run around the bike shop parking lot alone was testament to the idea that we may have made a mistake. I seriously could have used a pair of training wheels, and I may as well have been climbing on and off a horse for all the effort it took to get on and off that seat. Thankfully, we gave the new bikes some proper orientation time, and though we won’t be racing with the pros, we feel confident enough to handle a leisurely bike trail with not too much effort.
Though we haven’t attempted restaurant dining yet, we have become masters at ordering out and meal delivery. This isn’t something new, as we have been in the habit of taking out all too frequently over our 43 years of marriage; hence, our need for workouts and bike riding. Some of our favorites, like Uncle Tony’s Pizza and China Dynasty, offer curbside pickup, which is fine when we’re in the mood for a field trip to retrieve our meal. With the addition of mobile apps like Grub Hub, DoorDash and Uber Eats, ordering has never been more convenient. And now with no-contact delivery and pre-payment by credit card, we don’t even have to talk to a human being. They just drop and run. Just be sure to pick the food up off the doorstep before the raccoons get to it first. Of course, what good is a stay-at-home order without some liquid refreshment. May I recommend a wine suitable for a pandemic, MezzaCORONA chardonnay? It's very refreshing and pairs so well with a virus.
Now that summer is upon us and restrictions are being eased, those four walls are starting to come down. We’ve had friends and family over, restricted to small groups, of course. I'm putting plans on paper for some short getaways when it's safe to travel. Most importantly, FaceTime sessions with the grandsons, Alex and Will, have advanced to in-person visits complete with masks and social distancing. Most of all, I dream of a view of the sunset from the sea.
I hope and pray that we crush Covid soon so we can all get on with our lives. In the meantime, I still have those moments when I have no clue what to do with myself, but I know now that when REAL retirement comes, I‘ll be ready for it. I’ve had months of practice.
If you enjoyed this post, I’d be very grateful if you’d help spread it around by emailing it to a friend, or sharing it on Twitter or Facebook. Thanks!